To Quote a quote...
“In the immortal words of the doors, "the time to hesitate is through."”
Ok, I apologise that this update had taken so long to write, but hey, what can I say, I’ve been busy. But the odd thing is, if someone was to ask me “Busy doing what?” I wouldn’t have an answer. At least not a definite one. And ok, to some people me not having a straight answer isn’t anything new, but I find it strange that I cant put my finger on what has kept me so busy lately. I mean, yes, I’ve been doing schoolwork, but hey, newsflash, so does everyone else… well most people at any rate, who attend school or uni. And then those who don’t can name what they do, be it work, socialising, whatever.
Been having trouble sleeping recently. I’m beginning to wake up in the morning more tire than when I went to bed. Hopefully it will pass. I think it’s beginning to finally show. Especially to friends who see me the most. M’eh, I dunno. I guess I'm just feeling a little lost. I’m hopefully going to uni in just a few short months, and its slightly freaking me out a little. Ok, yes, most people who read this have already been there, done that, in some cases got the tee shirt or whatever they were handing out. But the prospect of me moving away from those that I love, and what I’ve become accustomed to for the last, what… 12 years or so? Must be… is a thought that scares me. But, as the Doors say, “the time to hesitate is through.”
Ever have those times where you just wish that the big person upstairs would stop messing you around, make something in your life go right, and that, even if it’s just for one day, your life made sense? And you were free to do what you wanted, without consequences? If you could do anything, knowing that everything would return to “normal” the next day, what would you do? …if there’s such a thing in the world as “normal” now… I really don’t know anymore. M’eh.
Found out the other day that I am apparently very hard to get over. And hey, it’s always nice to be appreciated, and wanted and everything… it’s just a little bit unnerving when the person who says that they think they’re falling in love with you is JJ. Hey, don’t get me wrong, he’s a good mate and everything,, and he knows that I don’t like him in that way, but still… why me?!! Why does everything in this world seem to crash on my shoulders? Ok, I know that’s not true, and that everyone has something in their life that they need to adjust to, and find hard to deal with, but lately it seems that I have a big arrow pointing over my head saying “Glutton for punishment” with everyone having a bet on how long I’m going to last. Well, ok, I give up. You all win. Take your winnings and just leave me alone!
It’s sort of bizarre. Judy has gotten her way, again, and is now on a different rotation than what she was. Now, instead of her and mark doing the same 2 week rotation, she has 3 weeks at dad’s and 1 week at mums. Meaning that now I’m only with her for 1 week out of a month, mark with 2. and I’m by myself for two. It just seems strange. I mean, yes Judith and me fight from time to time, but at the end of the day she is my sister, and I dunno, not having her around so much is, well wired. And it’s not like I can talk o her at school… that is a big no-no. sibling contact t school equals bad mistake. Very bad mistake. I guess I was just getting used to the routine of moving between houses, spending half my time with siblings and the other times just me, and although that’s nice, it feels more like a family when we’re all at the same house. Y’know? I never thought I’d miss my sister this much. Hmmm.
Well, now that I have managed to get myself thoroughly depressed, I think I’ll go and do some psychopathology homework… clinical characteristics if depression… hmm… me. Still. Maybe if I can get a good nights' sleep soon I’ll be able to feel better… maybe.
Ok, I apologise that this update had taken so long to write, but hey, what can I say, I’ve been busy. But the odd thing is, if someone was to ask me “Busy doing what?” I wouldn’t have an answer. At least not a definite one. And ok, to some people me not having a straight answer isn’t anything new, but I find it strange that I cant put my finger on what has kept me so busy lately. I mean, yes, I’ve been doing schoolwork, but hey, newsflash, so does everyone else… well most people at any rate, who attend school or uni. And then those who don’t can name what they do, be it work, socialising, whatever.
Been having trouble sleeping recently. I’m beginning to wake up in the morning more tire than when I went to bed. Hopefully it will pass. I think it’s beginning to finally show. Especially to friends who see me the most. M’eh, I dunno. I guess I'm just feeling a little lost. I’m hopefully going to uni in just a few short months, and its slightly freaking me out a little. Ok, yes, most people who read this have already been there, done that, in some cases got the tee shirt or whatever they were handing out. But the prospect of me moving away from those that I love, and what I’ve become accustomed to for the last, what… 12 years or so? Must be… is a thought that scares me. But, as the Doors say, “the time to hesitate is through.”
Ever have those times where you just wish that the big person upstairs would stop messing you around, make something in your life go right, and that, even if it’s just for one day, your life made sense? And you were free to do what you wanted, without consequences? If you could do anything, knowing that everything would return to “normal” the next day, what would you do? …if there’s such a thing in the world as “normal” now… I really don’t know anymore. M’eh.
Found out the other day that I am apparently very hard to get over. And hey, it’s always nice to be appreciated, and wanted and everything… it’s just a little bit unnerving when the person who says that they think they’re falling in love with you is JJ. Hey, don’t get me wrong, he’s a good mate and everything,, and he knows that I don’t like him in that way, but still… why me?!! Why does everything in this world seem to crash on my shoulders? Ok, I know that’s not true, and that everyone has something in their life that they need to adjust to, and find hard to deal with, but lately it seems that I have a big arrow pointing over my head saying “Glutton for punishment” with everyone having a bet on how long I’m going to last. Well, ok, I give up. You all win. Take your winnings and just leave me alone!
It’s sort of bizarre. Judy has gotten her way, again, and is now on a different rotation than what she was. Now, instead of her and mark doing the same 2 week rotation, she has 3 weeks at dad’s and 1 week at mums. Meaning that now I’m only with her for 1 week out of a month, mark with 2. and I’m by myself for two. It just seems strange. I mean, yes Judith and me fight from time to time, but at the end of the day she is my sister, and I dunno, not having her around so much is, well wired. And it’s not like I can talk o her at school… that is a big no-no. sibling contact t school equals bad mistake. Very bad mistake. I guess I was just getting used to the routine of moving between houses, spending half my time with siblings and the other times just me, and although that’s nice, it feels more like a family when we’re all at the same house. Y’know? I never thought I’d miss my sister this much. Hmmm.
Well, now that I have managed to get myself thoroughly depressed, I think I’ll go and do some psychopathology homework… clinical characteristics if depression… hmm… me. Still. Maybe if I can get a good nights' sleep soon I’ll be able to feel better… maybe.
posted by Chibi at
9:28 am
2 Comments:
Arrr chibi-chan *huggles madly* it's okay, you're going to be all right ^_^
Anyway if your home this weekend, I know the perfect way to ensure you get a good nights sleep, ANIME FEST!! I'll send you a text and see if you want to come over okay hunny?
By
Sarah, at 11:44 am
Oh dear oh dear poor Chibi! You seem to have a knack of attracting unwanted attention. What a bummer! Its only a matter of time before Mr Earl makes his big move!
By
Anonymous, at 3:34 pm
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